Circumspecte

Dear Diary, I have just had the most upsetting experience in my entire career as a student, my entire career as a living being even. I never understood why the Cowries Television Network insisted on airing that segment on strange happenings but I do know that my experience ought to be aired on their show. I flunked on the last major assignment for literature class and it’s not even my fault! Ms. Ashie gave us the assignment three weeks back and I did it. No cat pooped on it, no dog or hamster chewed on it, nothing of the sort. I actually submitted it on time! But…(You should be feeling all apprehensive right about now) When she handed it back, there, staring me right in the face, in a thick red marker, and embolden to about twice Ms. Ashie’s handwriting was “UNACCEPTABLE!” Talk about absurd! What’s more is the fact that the assignment was issued in groups. Objective: research into the life of Efua Sutherland. Unfortunately, I landed in the worst group ever created; Vug...

Dear Diary, I t’s kind of hard being second to last amongst nine siblings, you know? By the time you have learnt to ride a bike, seven othe rs would have already done it. Y our ‘great achievement’ would only bring back f ond memories of the time Juma rode hers, or the zillion times Hisham fell off his, before finally getting it right. Humph! Hel-lo! News flash: this is MY big moment! Funny. I cannot even enjoy my place down the line in peace. I cannot suck on my thumb, o r slurp my ice cream, because Karima might be watching, and “big sister is supposed to be a better example”. Big sister? The older child? “Mummy, can I stay up and watch the 10:30 movie?” “No, Lilly. It’s rated PG13. You are only 12 and a half”. Humph! So what am I? Old or young? Pretty confusing. Even the coolest names got snagged before my time. For the first three kids, Mummy was in her prim and proper, formal m ode: Juma, Hisham, Awuresi . Lovely. For the next four, she went all hip-hop, African-A...

Dear Diary, Today, I had to come to terms with the fact that I lied. There’s nothing worse than lying to yourself, especially if you spent half a year’s savings on celebrating the lie. Then again, it wasn’t exactly a lie… it was more like me conceding defeat, kind of like saying okay, so I cannot have this, so fine, I’ll try to live with it. Okay, so Diary, after how many days of convincing mysel f that I’m totally over Kuuku , one, just one (long, sweet, dreamy… sigh) conversation made me think otherwise: So here I am, all ready to go to Samira’s when Adjeley texts that she’s coming over, and I better be at home or else… (What can I say; a best friend has certain privileges). She gets here and say s she’s been talking to Kuuku online and he’s going to stay on for a long while, and he said to tell me that. Meaning he wants me to come on, right? So in a fla sh, me, Samira, Adjeley and Mansa , who just happens to stop by at that moment, fly to the café. My guy was really online! Did...

Dear Diary, Trying to be something you are not is so not cool. But there’s nothing wrong with enhancing who you are…becoming the “It Girl”…becoming a diva… I learnt that the hard way. The latter part of last year was so all- that and more for me. I went from quiet, shy Aphie to what was hot, new and happening; all in one breath, and it felt good! Everyone loved the change. But that was sop not me. There was more to me than I was letting out. Well, this year, Phase Three of “Growing Up” kicked in. The new Aphie. The true me. I’ve started paying attention to the things I missed before. It’s ok to hang out at night, only not too often else I might get mistaken for a call girl. Make-up is to enhance, not to mask my face. It’s best not to leave much to the imagination when I get dressed-not too many layers else I’ll hide my great figure; not too few either else… I’ve worked on character too-down with the shyness, don with the loudness and aggressiveness. All in all, I love who I am rig...