Circumspecte

Dear Diary, It’s the night of the big game and me and my boys are in front of the TV waiting patiently for the kick-off. We are evenly divided, four of us supporting Arsenal and the other four supporting Man United. The tension in the room is so apparent as the match commences. With sporadic shouts of “what dey wrong this player” and the usual “Oh!” So many minutes have passed but no goal and frustrations are beginning to show. I’m not talking about frustrations on the pitch mind you, but in our mini stadium. “I don’t even know why we bought this player, he’s useless”, Ekow declares. Five minutes later, the useless player scores th e opener for Man United. Kojo’s reaction? No comment. My team is down by a goal and Murtala takes the opportunity to taunt me. “So Mash, who be your chick?” I mean, can you believe him? Well I’m not the least amused by that question, not when my team is down. I’m about to give him a piece of my mind but just then Arsenal equalize. My fellow gunnas go beserk...

Dear Diary, Today, I had to come to terms with the fact that I lied. There’s nothing worse than lying to yourself, especially if you spent half a year’s savings on celebrating the lie. Then again, it wasn’t exactly a lie… it was more like me conceding defeat, kind of like saying okay, so I cannot have this, so fine, I’ll try to live with it. Okay, so Diary, after how many days of convincing mysel f that I’m totally over Kuuku , one, just one (long, sweet, dreamy… sigh) conversation made me think otherwise: So here I am, all ready to go to Samira’s when Adjeley texts that she’s coming over, and I better be at home or else… (What can I say; a best friend has certain privileges). She gets here and say s she’s been talking to Kuuku online and he’s going to stay on for a long while, and he said to tell me that. Meaning he wants me to come on, right? So in a fla sh, me, Samira, Adjeley and Mansa , who just happens to stop by at that moment, fly to the café. My guy was really online! Did...

Dear Diary, I’m totally convinced that some “friends” just make it their official duty of letting one down. One thing I can ’ t stand is being disappointed and that's exactly how I feel right n ow. I mean, how the hell can Olesugun back down on the deal we planned ages ago? I really don't think I’ll get over this one anytime soon. Mayb e I need to review my friend's list and right now, one na me stands the opportunity of being deleted and trash- canned . I know he's avoiding me, but I 'll get him soon, and believe me , there will be fireworks, and I’m not talking about the 6th of March. ADVICE “I’ll be here for you no matter what.”, “I got your back”, “We’ll stick it through the hard times as one.” All these remarks build up a sense of trust and loyalty for our friends. However, these words are quite unrealistic in their own way. For one thing, our friends cannot ALWAYS be there for us. Sometimes, circumstances get out of hand and thus prevent them from do...

Dear Diary, I am so angry right now! Riad has really overstepped his bounds this time! I’m fed up! I mean, how much can one expect of a girl? I’m just me. You dun like that, well that’s your problem! Right? Come to think of it, I don’t know what his problem is….Its not like I went and cheated on him or anything. Gosh. He’s so full of it. C’mon, there are about a trillion guys I know who would kill to get the kinda attention I give Riad. I call him at least every two days, send him texts just to let him know I care or I’m thinking of him AND I help him with his school work sometimes. It’s not like I don’t have other things doing, but just so I fit into the description of girlfriend….maybe that’s it….we need to redefine what girlfriend means. Darn! You should see me right now; I’m so fuming mad, I’m actually shaking. I really wonder what’s gotten into him for him to even consider having sex with me! Hell, that’s so insulting! And, as if that’s not enough, he had the nerve to tell me t...

Dear Diary, Me and a couple of my pals were talking the other day…what about? What else! Its all aba em girls. Kwesi and the others had different views on the issue, not all of them very realistic, but opinions nevertheless. I believe women are more or less an enigma but probably misunderstood most of the time. Let me explain. Personally, I’ve never been in a relationship with a girl so I’m speaking from what I have seen and heard. The one thing which keeps recurring in relationships is the time factor. I’m sure they’ll (women) disagree with me here but I’m afraid I can trace it to even (shhhhhh, don’t tell her), my mom. You know when the family wants to go somewhere and with like five minutes to the time, she hasn’t figured out what she’s going to wear, what perfume she’s going to use, high heels or not, the list is endless basically. There are other factors like jealousy, money, which I’m not going to delve into because, I’ll not finish. It’s like Hannah Cowley said, “What is wo...

Dear Diary, Trying to be something you are not is so not cool. But there’s nothing wrong with enhancing who you are…becoming the “It Girl”…becoming a diva… I learnt that the hard way. The latter part of last year was so all- that and more for me. I went from quiet, shy Aphie to what was hot, new and happening; all in one breath, and it felt good! Everyone loved the change. But that was sop not me. There was more to me than I was letting out. Well, this year, Phase Three of “Growing Up” kicked in. The new Aphie. The true me. I’ve started paying attention to the things I missed before. It’s ok to hang out at night, only not too often else I might get mistaken for a call girl. Make-up is to enhance, not to mask my face. It’s best not to leave much to the imagination when I get dressed-not too many layers else I’ll hide my great figure; not too few either else… I’ve worked on character too-down with the shyness, don with the loudness and aggressiveness. All in all, I love who I am rig...

Dear Diary, I know I haven’t been consistent in keeping you updated on the happenings in my life, and I’m not going to make excuses for my behavior. However, there’s a good reason; a really good reason: Naa. Over the past two months, Naa n I have gotten real close. You know how I thought that she detested me? Well, apparently I was way off! She actually loves me! I don’t know how to explain how I feel right now but the feeling’s most definitely great. It does have its downside though; like when she’s really busy with all those activities she’s involved in and I don’t get to spend time with her. It hurts. Literally. Okay, so what’s it about Naa that’s got me totally smitten? That’s an easy question. First of all, she’s a really cool person. She’s great to talk to, smart, cute and she doesn’t mind playing ball with me sometimes. Only, I tend to let her have the easy shots. All I really wanna do now is just make her happy. Oh well, what can I say? I’m in deep. I hope you understand me u...

Dear Diary, I’ve been laughing so hard the sides of my stomach are beginning to ache. I really shouldn’t laugh so much though, cos for a certain person, the issue that’s making me laugh is real serious. (Totally grim faced, with no smiles.) O.k. o.k. I’ll fill you in on the “joke”. Konadu actually thinks that I have the hots for the guy she likes! I’m thinking aliens have invaded Ghana or something cos that notion of hers is way off base! What’s more is she isn’t relating to me like she used to…no more teasing and stuff. Oh well. Aight, I’ll cut the indifference act. That DID get to me. It might not be that obvious, but I really value my friendship with Konadu. She’s like the twin I never had. (You and I both know that “twins” doesn’t even begin to describe our connection.) That’s why I would most definitely NOT let ANY guy come between us (Unless of course, that guy is…lol. I’m just kidding, ok?) I must say that it’s a good thing that I realized what was going on with her before...

1- Being humble, yet confident and aware of your strengths can be a juggling act. The key is realizing that nothing is guaranteed, and so you have nothing to lose. 2- Sometimes you have to realize its not about you...cos it really isn't. 3- People come your way for a reason, and each of them sticks around for a predetermined season. Appreciating the value of the people you meet - both good and bad - helps you grow as an individual. 4- If you don't stand for something, you'll fall for anything. 5- Sometimes you need to take a step back from it all and concentrate on the lil' girl (or boy) within. 6- The fact that you treat people in a certain manner doesn't mean they will reciprocate. Sometimes you'll be pleasantly surprised or horribly disappointed. 7- There comes a point in time when you will feel like you cannot possibly handle everything going on. At this point take things a day at a time and call up the troops (God, family, friends). 8- You might want to do ...

I have wanted to do this post ever since I took an international trade seminar in my final year in college. It was a pretty eye-opening experience, but like just about everything on the international front, there were no clear cut solutions or resolutions. This past Wednesday, July 17 2009 I participated in a bloggers-only roundtable teleconference on "Obama, Technology and Rural Development" - an initiative that was sponsored by Africa Rural Connect and the National Peace Corps Association. We got a chance to interact with Arlene Mitchell, a Senior Program Officer for the Bill and Melinda Gates Foundation for an hour, and I personally found it to be a pretty eye-opening and interesting experience. [You can listen to a podcast of the roundtable discussion here . To skip to my comments + question, go towards the end (the last 10 minutes or so).] Many participants highlighted the fact that technology can in fact help Africans transform their lives, and is already doing so. I d...

A lot of people have asked me what I think about Obama's visit to Ghana, and specifically, his speech to Ghanaian parliamentarians. It's undoubted that his presence in Ghana was a historic one - mainly because he is the first black US president, and Ghana is the first sub-Saharan African country to gain independence. It was also a great occasion because in many ways than one, Obama has succeeded in reminding a great number of people, about the possibilities that abound, if they are willing to work hard and take the necessary risks. Now that said, I did have some qualms about his visit, because it represents not only possibilities, but challenges too. I aired similar concerns in my article The Obama Effect & the African Illusion during Obama's presidential campaign . Bottomline is, Obama's successes can only be beneficial to Africans, if we regard them as proof that we can make a difference and be the change we want to see in our world. The moment we begin to conce...

Hi people, Hope everything is going well with all of you. I know I haven't written on here in a while, I'm thinking about restructuring the blog layout to make it easier for you to access what you want, so please bear with me. In the meantime. I decided to do a quick book review: Ayesha Harruna Attah's Harmattan Rain . If you remember, I interviewed Ayesha when her book was first released in the U.S., [Read interview here ] and I finally read it!!! First of all, let me say that the very fact that this young lady wrote an entire book is in itself very inspirational!!! And to think she was involved in the entire process of making the book - concept, writing, layout, design etc- is mindblowing. If you're away from Ghana at the moment and feeling nostalgic about the 'little things' - chit-chats in trotros, Ghanaian English/pidgeon, kelewele and other wayside delights, the importance of having connections or 'knowing someone' in Ghana - then you need to get t...